Taoism VS Marriage is a good topic, because almost everyone in the world now will have a chance to get married. Without marriage, there is no you, me, or them. Marriage is what bonds people together and allows us to give birth to the next generation, which is why human does not extinct. From here on, I will present you Pure Taoism, Tin Yat Lineage Taoism’s theory and philosophies on marriage!
Taoism VS Marriage, Against the Monks and Nuns
Some “Taoist Sects” that are not “Pure Taoism” do have monks and nuns, meaning that they will adopt the Buddhist practice of accepting students or disciples and have them detach from their home, family and just purely live in the temple or in the mountain and “cultivate” their stuff for the whole life. This is mostly influenced by Buddhism and only the non-Pure Taoism sects will do this.
Pure Taoism, Tin Yat Lineage is STRONGLY against the method of accepting monks and nuns. As explained in our article of “Taoism CANNOT blend with Buddhism – Why?“, we had emphasized a few times that this practice is not right. This is no different from robbing and scamming children or family members from their family and get them to become your free labor. If everyone is into their religion and went for this path, human will extinct!
Monks and Nuns are not allowed to get married, nor even talk about love at all. They see love and marriage as an obstacles in life, which is totally not what Taoism’s path talks about.
Think about the fact that without marriage, will there be you? Who give birth to the monks and nuns? Marriage is important, as it allows us to have a new generation after us, and also allow human beings to avoid extinction. Those who are against marriage, like those religions, are evil and wrong in our eyes. They ignore and do not appreciate their roots, and they chose to cut the roots of others, or promotes men and women to be irresponsible for their families. Just because the religion is “old”, it doesn’t make them “right”. We are totally against their practice.
Taoism VS Marriage, Essence of Marriage
The primary essence of marriage is nothing but love. It’s because you and the other one love each other, you two will want to stay together and live a life together.
The secondary essence of marriage is what bonds the love of the two together. There are five factors in this category, and they are:
- Trust and Faith
- Virtues and Morals
Honesty meaning both sides should not lie and should be open enough to tell each other anything. There should be nothing to hide, no secrets, and no hidden rules or contract. Some people will sort of have a “secret” saving account that they don’t let the other side know. Well, that is not honest. Do you wish the other side to do that to you too? If not, what you expect it the other way around to work?
Trust and Faith
Trust and Faith are two things. Trust is not given but earned. With honestly, trust is earned. Trust is built by observation and experience. Like if you ask someone to do something for you ten times, and they always finish the work on-time, they earns your trust. In a marriage, both parties should have trust in each others.
Faith is something you output first before actions is done by the other side. Which means it is not something earned, it is something you have to give, without expectation of a result. Just like you don’t know if the plumber can fix your drain, but you look at him and say “I have faith in you”, meaning that you don’t know but you just have a good feeling for it. Faith doesn’t needs proofs.
Virtues and Morals
Virtues and morals are different things. The best way to learn about virtues now might be to go with the standard of “Tao Te Ching REBORN” which is a book I wrote (free to read). Mainly speaking, it is being understanding and acting with responsibility for both sides to feel good being with each others. Morals are or about the politeness and considerateness while being together. Without these, one side will get mad, or even get into a physical fight. When the physical harassment kick in, the marriage is over most of the time.
Communication is based on honesty, trust and faith, virtues and morals. With good communication, both sides will not have misunderstanding, guesses and confusion. Most of the arguments between couples are all about misunderstanding. Therefore, we must eliminate this factor in order to nourish the relationship everyday.
Thinking of marriage as a boat, and you two are being on the same boat. Do not be selfish and think it is only your matter, or his/her matter. Everything you encounter is a matter to both. Just like saying one side gone jobless and the other said thinks “It’s your fault, you should get a new job, now you are making the family poor!” That is not togetherness, that is blaming and selfishness. When togetherness is there, you should only think of how you can help the other side to recover from the situation, and not to find ways to blame this and that.
Taoism VS Marriage, Fixing Problems with Marriage
When a marriage ran into a problem, or a bad state, or a bad condition, we must reflect and relearn from the basic elements that bond the marriage together at the first place. Looking over the five secondary essence for a reflection, what is lacking? If you do not lack any, there is no reason why your marriage will run into a jam situation. Fix the problem by reinforcing the 5 elements above and you shall see changes happen.
Taoism VS Marriage, Reinforcing Marriage
In order to reinforce or fix a marriage, there are two major categories to look at:
Cause: Marriage problems often occurs when Pre-Heaven factors such as curses, evil magic, or “ECP” override the natural love.
Fix: With Taoist Magic, we can fix this by using exorcism, cleansing and then using our Taoism FU for Love and Relationship to help with fixing the energy up between the two. It’s very effective when the problem is diagnosed by us.
Cause: There are cases when a marriage is broken because they failed the post-heaven factors or got influenced by the pose-heaven factors. These factors, beside the five secondary essence we mentioned above, are mostly due to interpersonal problem, Feng Shui problem, or health problems.
Fix: Reinforce the relationship with the 5 essence as mentioned above, and also get some Feng Shui consultation done for the house to get your house’s Feng Shui re-arrange. With some effort, these shall fix the problems.
In conclusion of this Taoism VS Marriage article, we Taoist are strongly against those monks and nuns practice, and strongly emphasize that marriage is a good thing to do, when you do it right. Never give up marriage or think getting married is a bad thing. In fact, it is one of the best thing int he world – when it is done right!
Mak Jo Si
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